I wish...

I hope that I can have a bigger dot overseas on my Clustr Map...sometime soon...

Team Spirit

I'm sitting here, drinking a glass of wine, enjoying a bowl of Fruity Pebbles, and watching Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders: Making the Team.

I just watched a girl have her lifelong dream of being a Cowboy's cheerleader be crushed because her high-kick wasn't good enough.

I think I would have more problems than that. What? You want to see me do the splits and a double hurkey again? Hold on, I just need to finish this glass of Shiraz first, and then I'm there. 100%. This cheese? Oh, I have to eat this to bring out the flavors in the wine.

No worries, I'm cool. Be right there.

Right.

Merry Christmas, honey - I shaved!

Tra la la

This was on TV this afternoon (no lie - I can't make this stuff up.)

Wynonna - A Tribute on Ice

And I missed it.

Shoot.

Discoveries

I've discovered that west Texas winds and lip gloss do not make a good combination.

I've also discovered that decorating for Christmas takes time. Specifically set aside time. And if you don't set aside this time, your house is not decorated come Christmas day.

Phooey.

Sup

Why don't oysters donate to charity?

Because they're shellfish.

___________________________

There was an SUV in front of me today with three baseball stickers on the back that had numbers and, supposedly, their children's names on them. There was a pink sticker that said "Meggan," a green sticker that said "Riggen," and an orange sticker that said "Bugg."

Wha...?

Ha Ha

Why was the ocean wet?

Because the seaweed.

Sleep

Whilst on vacation, I woke up earlier than I would to go to work.

Oh, the wonders of having a 6 year old nephew...I need a nap.

Cat Lover

Cat Lover
by Brian Andreas

I've had cats since I was young, she said, and I still love them. See, I said, you don't have to be smart to be happy.

(to see more StoryPeople art, click here)

I think the husband will love that quote (which is why I'm not going to show it to him:)

Two Very Important Things

An establishment I passed esterday: The Patriot: Firearms & Family Shooting Center

"Ok, kids! Get yer guns! We're headed to the shootin' place!"

_____________

Tonight at Abuelos I ordered the "Tres Leches" cake for dessert. I asked the waitress how it was, and she said it was made from "three milks," so it was really creamy.

I kind of deduced that part on my own, considering the cake was called, um, Three Milks.

_____________

And if you knew how long it took me to type this with Maggie rolling all over the keyboard, you'd appreciate it just a bit more :)

Warm

Dear little bathroom heater,

Thank you for making my mornings warmer, and a bit less traumatic getting out of the shower each morning. Your the best, little guy!

Love,

Melissa

Watchers Beware

Saw Feast of Love last night, with Morgan Freeman and Greg Kinear.

It was sad...tender...and pornographic. As in full frontal nudity.

To quote Sesame Street..."One of these things does not belong..."

And the winner is...

An e-mail trail between my dear mother (who was in Estes Park, Colorado last week) and me...

--------------
Mom: A tiny little chipmunky just climbed on my foot!

Me: What's a chipmunky? :)

Mom: A teeny extra-cute chipmunk.

Me: Give him some retro sunglasses and cool shoes, and he'll be a funky chipmunky!

Mom: And LOTS of peanuts, and he'll be a funky chunky chipmunky!

Me: Then we can give him a nean green mohawk, and he'll be a funky chunky punky chipmunky!

Mom: And he can work out and wear a speedo and be a funky chunky punky hunky chipmunky!
--------------

She won.

Gross

A quote from Discovery's TV show Dirty Jobs, on growing mushrooms:

"I'm sorry to tell you, folks...but these mushrooms don't grow in nice little blue containers. They're grown in compost - big steamy piles of poo, pee and lots of straw."

No wonder I don't like them. I always thought they tasted like, well, poo.


P.S. I'm famous! Check out September 19th - that was my lovely personal experience, one of many during my career as a waitress.

Click here to read my engaging post...


I'm so cool.

Blinkers

They're called blinkers, people. They don't put 'em there for decoration.

Anyhoo, Maggie says hi.

Wine-O

Last night at dinner, a friend and I went to a funky little restaurant/bar and sat on the balcony "overlooking a scenic lake." (As scenic as you can get for Lubbock, Texas...)

I wanted a glass of red wine, so I asked the waitress to tell the bartender that I wanted a glass of the driest red they had.

So what did I get? Port. Not only is it not a dry red, but one of the sweetest there is.

I went inside with my sweet red, and mentioned it to the 22 year old (I should have known) bartender. His response? "Uh, oh yeah, I, uh, guess I forgot."

So I went for Shiraz.

I mean it!

I WANT FALL!!! NOW!!!

I'M IN AN ALL CAPS AND EXCLAMATION POINT SORT OF MOOD!!!

DEAL!!!

I Wish I Were in CO

It's September, finally starting to feel like fall...mid 70s...open-window weather...

But a note to the person two doors down from me? (I can't believe I'm saying this, as I have true-blue Colorado blood running through my veins...)

It is too early for a wood-burning fire. Inside. When my air conditioner is still running.

But if you go live in Colorado, you can have a fire. Because it's colder up there.

(Two posts in two days? Who am I???)

Yo

So I'm here at my friend's house, and I looked at her desk and saw a box of flash cards. Whoopee, right? But then (this is the good part)...I saw they were anatomy flash cards! I could have fun with these.

I'm going almost black hair with pink highlights.

Maggie's big.

The husband's kickin' heinie at school.

It's been raining this week. We even had a bit of thunder.

Work rocks.

I watched a good friend get not one, but TWO, tattoos at once, and didn't pass out! (The girl next to her didn't do so well. And neither did her tattoo. Oops. They tell you not to move for a reason.)

I have lime green toenails, and love them.

(Isn't this a titillating post?)

Well, if I don't go wash my hair out in the next two minutes, I will have no hair.

I've realized that I have not been posting as often (well, not at all...) and really thought about it. I've decided that I was so unhappy throughout my whole blogging "history," and it really helped having an outlet. Not so much to vent, but to see that people actually read my blog, and said nice things to me (at that point, people weren't being very nice to me.) Even if I don't know your face, I knew that you visited me every day, and that, at least in a passing way, actually enjoyed what I had to say.

I now am around people that, well, smile when they see me, and, well, say hello. Simple, right? But it makes a HUGE difference, I tell you what.

But I miss you guys, and will be back real soon (yes, I know that wasn't proper grammar.)

Sleep tight, don't let the bedbugs bite. And if you have bedbugs, you might need to get some help with that.

Housewife of the Year!

I did two things last night that I haven't done in months. I bought perishables. And I cooked. Dinner.

Go me!